When I think of Superman I don’t think of a chubby disheveled guy half naked standing on a porch trying to get a better Wi-Fi signal with his laptop, but that’s just what Tom Welling is doing. If Welling normally turns you on, then you might want to get your memory erased, and watch a few episodes of Smallville. Maybe this is what Clark Kent looks like, which means he really isn’t superman after all. Kent is pudgy, but Superman looks like a muscle bound god of a man who races trains, catches bullets in his teeth, and in his spare time oils himself up and poses nude for art classes. Maybe Clark, I mean Welling, should start lifting weights or something.

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