Next season’s contestants on "Dancing With the Stars" have been "leaked." I’m guessing this is the same kind of leak that happens when Paris Hilton calls the paparazzi to tell them where she is going to be and then feigns shock and horror when they actually show up. Yeah, that kind of leak. Anyway, the list is a veritable who’s who in the world of Has-Beens. TMZ has named them on their site, along with photos. Here is the list: Tori Spelling, Jennie Garth, Aaron Carter, Mark Cuban, Wayne Newton, Jane Seymour, Floyd Mayweather Jr., Nia Peeples, Richard Quest, Lou Ferrigno, Gisele Bundchen, Helio Castroneves, and Sabrina Bryan. Apparently Melanie Brown, a.k.a. Mel B., a.k.a. Scary Spice, is going to be involved in the show in some form, but not as a dancer. We’re guessing that her freaky deaky husband probably forbade her to dance.

Can’t you just read the tag line for this show? What happens when Donna Martin, the Hulk, and Proactiv-spokesperson-to-be Aaron Carter sashay into the world of dancing? Hilarity ensues!

The nice thing is that a bus will pick up the contestants after the show wraps and take them to their stint on "The Surreal Life."

Jim Carrey might be known for his zany sense of humor, but girlfriend Jenny McCarthy appears to be dead serious about her body. TMZ posted this photo of her on a recent vacation with Jim in Hawaii. McCarthy has admitted to using Weight Watchers to help her lose the baby weight she gained after having her son. Can you imagine being an overweight, suburban mom who can’t fit into her size 14 jeans and this skinny beeyatch shows up? I’m surprised they didn’t beat her, tie her up, and force her to eat a gallon of Chubby Hubby.

TMZ just broke the huge news that Nicole Richie checked herself into prison today.

She was booked at the Lynwood Jail, where Paris did her time, at 3:15 this afternoon. Great move by her lawyer Shawn Chapman Holley. While all the attention was on Lindsay, no one was watching Nicole.

She can etch her name right next to "Paris was hear." And yes, that would be how she’d spell it. These girls are getting off so easy, I wouldn’t be surprised if Nicole has a mani/pedi scheduled while in the clink.

More news from The Land of Crazy–while it’s been determined that Britney is still here in Los Angeles, she is apparently considering a move across the pond. Perhaps Britney thinks the British will be more welcoming of her reckless mothering skills. She probably based the decision on watching Bridget Jones’s Diary. Pass the English muffins y’all! TMZ reports:

The popwreck, according to OK!, is considering the move as she fights K-Fed for custody of her sons, and according to a source, "She thinks her only hope is to move to London and start afresh. She wants those boys more than anything in the world and it’s heartbreaking."

Meanwhile, reports Life & Style, Brit was sending mixed signals last weekend at L.A. hotspot Teddy’s, partying into the wee hours, but seeming "down" and looking "uncomfortable" while telling the mag that her custody battle was harshing her mellow: "My babies are my life."

When asked to find London on a globe, Britney pointed to Toledo, Ohio.

Nothing says football like a bowl of chips, a case of beer, and Ryan Seacrest? In the "pull my other leg and it plays Jingle Bells" news, TMZ is reporting that the metrosexual-in-denial will, indeed, have a presence at this year’s Super Bowl. Apparently, he’ll be handling pre-game and halftime hosting duties. Rumor has it Seacrust was actually on the fence about the hosting job, but the NFL threw in free mani/pedi’s for a year. Sold!

First we saw Janet Jackson’s boob. Now Ryan Seacrest will be hosting the Super Bowl. If douche-of-the-year Criss Angel mindfreakifies the half time show, I will live underground for the rest of my life eating grub worms and drinking sewage.