The Smoking Gun has reported that the FBI just took David Hans Schmidt of Arizona (the guy pictured below who looks like he just got busted by Chris Hansen) into custody for attempting to extort money from Tom Cruise for photos of…wait for it…his wedding!  GASP! 

The Arizona man who has been dubbed the "Sultan of Sleaze" for his role in the distribution of celebrity sex tapes was arrested this week for his alleged role in an extortion plot targeting Tom Cruise, The Smoking Gun has learned.

David Hans Schmidt, 47, was nabbed Tuesday by FBI agents and is currently being held at the federal detention center in L.A.. He allegedly tried to sell Cruise a large cache of private photos from the actor’s November 2006 wedding to Katie Holmes. Schmidt sought more than $1 million for the wedding photos, which were stolen from the actor, said Bert Fields, a Cruise lawyer.

Look, I know Scientologists are weird but if the raciest thing you can find Tom Cruise doing is getting married you’re looking in the wrong gay bars…er…places.  The only thing I can think of is that the guy actually has proof that they cut Katie’s legs in half and put Tom on a giant stool for their wedding photos.

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Designer Hugo Boss threw a party for the opening of Berlin Fashion Week yesterday. Reports say that Katie Holmes and Suri were not allowed into the party. The reasoning behind this snub was that "the guest list was closed and there were already too many people inside the event," according to contactmusic.com.

People, don’t you know the hurt that the Cruise family can put on you? Xenu is bad enough, but you just know that they have voo doo dolls of every single person that’s ever crossed them. Any day now, Matt Lauer will get out of bed and his penis will just fall off.

Monday, wire reports said that the World War II movie "Valkyrie" would not be allowed to film on German military sites because its star, Tom Cruise, is a Scientologist. Now the German government has reconsidered, deciding that the story of high ranking German officers attempting to assassinate Adolph Hitler was important because it’s a rare positive portrayal of Germans during the war. ABC.com says:

The German ministry now says that, while it hasn’t received an official request from "Valkyrie" producers to shoot in the country, it would "look agreeably" upon any such application.

The source of the "Valkyrie" controversy seems to have stemmed from a posting on the Web site of conservative German member of parliament Antje Blumenthal. Blumenthal posted a statement Friday claiming that Defense Minister Franz-Josef Jung had pledged to her that Cruise would not get permission to shoot because of the purported danger posed by his Scientology.

"Valkyrie" is being praised as one of the "too few examples of military opposition to Hitler’s regime."

"The assassination attempt against Hitler is hardly known outside Germany," Fisser said. "We should therefore be delighted and welcome this wonderful opportunity to improve the image of our country."

German wimps. Just when you think someone will stand up for their beliefs and say, "we will not allow dwarfs into our culture", they wimp out. Think Jesse Jackson had anything to do with this? Sure smells like it. Actually now that I take a few seconds to think about it, David Hasselhoff probably made one little phone call. The Germans might be hoping Tom Cruise will use his Scientology powers to go back in time to smoke that Hitler dude and change the time line. It’ll never happen though, because if Cruise did take Hitler out, then Cruise himself will never be born. Hmmm, sounds like a win-win.

A source who used to work for Brittany Murphy says Brittany is convinced "a high-powered Hollywood player" is stalking her. Back in April, her then boyfriend and now husband Simon Monjack disappeared for 10 days and Brittany claimed he had been kidnapped by agents of her stalker. However, the kidnapping exactly coincides with the dates that Monjack, a British citizen, was reportedly jailed by U.S. immigration for overstaying his visa.

"When he came back, he had head injuries," says the former insider. "He was pale and sometimes had trouble standing." Not only that, but the former staffer also claims Murphy said she was unable to pay him because the money had been used for ransom … Monjack, a screenwriter, is not short of enemies. Several anonymous sources have posted unflattering stories on the Internet about his past relationships. On June 13, a man identifying himself as Arturo Globenfeldt posted a message on Monjack’s Imdb.com page claiming he owes him $16 million in film investment money.

So the guy gets kicked out of the country for 10 days and then tells Brittany Murphy he was kidnapped and she believes him. This is actually scary. It sounds just like a Law and Order episode. Monjack’s story would have been more believable if he had said he had been kidnapped by aliens and their leader was Tom Cruise.

It is difficult to believe this story given the unnamed, former employee, who didn’t get paid source that was used. If Murphy was really that stupid she would have become a Scientologist years ago.

Wire reports today say that Germany will not allow a movie starring Tom Cruise to film at German military sites because Cruise is a Scientologist. Reuters says:

Cruise, also one of the film’s producers, is a member of the Church of Scientology which the German government does not recognize as a church. Berlin says it masquerades as a religion to make money, a charge Scientology leaders reject.

Cruise has been cast as Colonel Claus von Stauffenberg, leader of the unsuccessful attempt to assassinate the Nazi dictator in July 1944 with a bomb hidden in a briefcase.

Defense Ministry spokesman Harald Kammerbauer said the film makers "will not be allowed to film at German military sites if Count Stauffenberg is played by Tom Cruise, who has publicly professed to being a member of the Scientology cult".

Okay, Mr. Cruise, you can be a Scientologist. But beware, we Germans aren’t all smiles and sunshine. Tom’s life would have been a lot easier if he had not followed a third rate science fiction author, and instead followed a first rate science fiction author like George Lucas who created Star Wars.