Puff Diddy. Dim Witty. Whatever his name is. If his "good friend" Sienna Miller can’t keep it straight, why should we be expected to stay informed?

The rapper/producer/designer/entrepreneur/baby daddy formerly known as Sean "Puffy" Combs has recorded a new song because he is suffering. According to Page Six:

SEAN Combs is mining his heartbreak for artistic purposes. Having been dumped by the mother of three of his children, Combs has cut a song titled "Through the Pain . . . a k a Kim Porter," and a video that debuted Thursday on "106 & Park" on BET. Hip-hop Web site Sohh.com reports Combs created the music video as a response to Porter’s appearance on CNN discussing their breakup. "This is how he’s coming back," the site says. "Basically it’s like, ‘You’re putting me through hell.’

Is he kidding? So much for symbolism and mystery.

This is the musical equivalent of those badly written tragedy books the publishers churn out to quickly profit from the 24-hour-news culture. Or those Law & Order episodes, ripped from the headlines.

If he’s going to milk this for sympathy and dollars, he’d appeal to more of the public by being more honest with his obvious song titles.

Kim Porter, I Know I Did(died) You Wrong, But Damn Girl That Sienna is Hot!

(My Baby Mama Just Had Twins) Meet Me Out for Some Cristal

Or, he could rip off…er…."sample" Lionel Richie and sing something like Once, Twice, Three Times, My Babies…But I’ll Never Marry You

Sienna Miller just came out denying anything more than friendship with Sean Combs. According to Rush & Malloy:

"I am in love with someone, but not Puff Daddy," she told ZeeNews.com. "He’s just a good friend. Anyway, he has a beautiful girlfriend."

They can’t be very "good friends" if she doesn’t use his name du jour.

Just in time, Diddy has released an official statement confirming the break-up with his Baby Mama.

Wonder if that dilutes Sienna’s statement. Will she rush to his side now that he’s actually single? Or will that make Puffy less interesting to her?

If the Daily Mail is to be believed (and why wouldn’t they be) Diddy’s "friendship" with Sienna Miller led to the latest off-again of his longtime, intermittent relationship with the mother of three of his four children, Kim Porter.

Apparently, Diddy’s most recent gallivanting with the skanky Brit was the last straw for Porter, who gave birth to the couple’s twins in December.

Rumours of a rift between the two began circulating earlier this year when, right after the birth of the twins, Combs was seen out partying with Sienna till the early hours of the morning.

After the Factory Girl premiere the actress was spotted sneaking into her hotel at 9am in the morning with the rap star in tow.

But Diddy, told photographers at the hotel: "Man, I was just being a gentleman and dropping her off.

"Yeah, we all hang out together but there’s no more to it than that."

However, in the week prior to that they were seen cosying up after meeting at a film festival in Utah.

The friendship between Combs and Miller was rekindled last weekend when he arrived in London to perform in the Concert for Diana at Wembley Arena.

We’re guessing that January was pretty busy for Porter, and that she delayed her departure for a more manageable time. That in her postpartum hormonal state she resisted tracking Miller down and strangling her is a real testament to Porter’s self control.

If we had just delivered number 3 and number 4, out of wedlock for Thug Cheaty and heard that lame excuse about being a "gentleman" we would be on trial for double murder right about now. Or hiding out in Mexico learning Spanish and drinking mucho Pinas. Ole!