In the "Does Anyone Really Care?" category, Laura Prepon and Chris Masterson are apparently back together. Page Six reports:

"OCTOBER Road" actress Laura Prepon wants the world to know she’s back with her longtime boyfriend, Chris Masterson. Prepon and Masterson split briefly in May, but were spotted "kissing and holding hands" during a dinner at the Meatpacking District’s Fig & Olive a few nights ago. "They looked very much in love," dished a spy. "They kept going outside for cigarette breaks." Chris’ brother Danny Masterson, who’s Prepon’s "That ’70s Show" co-star, and a few friends joined the couple, who started dating in 2000.

Nothing says I love you like frequent trips to sully your lungs with cancer sticks. Perhaps they can mark their commitment with hard alcohol, unsafe sex, and a 2-for-1 deal at the tanning salon.

Source

Page Six is reporting that Lindsay Lohan’s new rehab friend, the NYC check-pilferer Dori Cooperman, isn’t exactly being welcomed with open arms by the Firecrotch Faithful. They’re on to her plans and watching her maneuver to cement her relationship with her new BFF.

In all of the oceanfront photos and videos of Lohan’s party, one face keeps popping up: that of Cooperman, who extended her own rehab stay at Promises in a cheesy bid to befriend the center’s highest-profile resident, some of her New York pals say…

…Us Weekly will run the exclusive snaps in its next issue, Lohan’s rep confirmed. "Dori will be just thrilled to see her face in Us Weekly," sniped one partygoer. "Lindsay’s been warned about her. Right now, she’s being really nice and friendly to everybody, but everyone knows what Dori’s agenda is."

What exactly would the agenda be? Either Lohan is recovered or she isn’t.

So Cooperman either plans to scrap her own sobriety and ride the crazy coke-fueled train that is Lohan’s downward spiral to its inevitably tragic destination.

Or she’s already at work learning card games and scouting out the coolest Hollywood Bingo Parlors to frequent with her boring ginger-haired pal.

Dori, you little mailbox thief, has it really come to this?

This illustration from Pretty On The Outside captures the spirit of Paris Hilton’s escape to Hawaii.

Page Six is reporting that Hilton’s time in Hawaii was filled with the same antics we’ve learned to loathe, with Hilton in cahoots with the paparazzi and snubbing the locals.

"The paparazzi told us that Paris calls them herself," said a different source, who claimed a lensman told him, "We love her. She lets us know where she’s going to be so we can take as many pictures as we want."

The Four Seasons guest reinforced that impression, noting, "She was shopping at the Wailea concourse, strutting around, posing for the cameras. It was disgusting."

But Hilton didn’t tell the paparazzi what she was doing at night. "She slipped out of the hotel and went to the club at the Hyatt a couple of times," we’re told. "She made friends with a couple of local guys and made out with them there. I guess she didn’t want pictures of herself doing that."

Hilton’s loyal lapdog/publicist Elliot Mintz denies it all, claiming the reports to be a fabrication.

Who are we to believe? A lackey on the Paris payroll. Or the upstanding citizens and tourists of the islands.

Yup. A no-brainer.

People. com has a little story about the excitement at NYC hotspot Butter the other night. Other outlets (including Page Six) claimed that Madonna notably shined Janet Jackson on, while partying with a number of famous friends.

Of course, it could be senility. Madonna is looking pretty haggard lately.

People is reporting this:

Madonna, Janet Jackson, Shakira, Ashton Kutcher, Demi Moore and others were living it up in the club’s swank banquettes.

Looking comfortable in her créme getup with suspenders hanging at her waist and her hair in a ponytail, Madge made a grand entrance – accompanied by three bodyguards. During her 30-minute visit, her hit "Like a Prayer" was piped over the speakers. Around the same time, Jackson strolled in, looking slim, with her hair pulled back tightly into a pristine bun.

So, it’s established that Madonna and Jackson arrived around the same time.

Then, People details the activities all of these superstars, except Miss Jackson, as well as the movements of Penelope Cruz, David Blaine, and Tony Parker. (What? No Guy Ritchie or Gary Coleman?)

The story ends with: "At around 2:45, the group checked out, continuing their party at Bungalow 8."

Though there’s no actual mention of Madge ignoring the Rhythm Nation artist, one can infer that "the group" that went on to party at Bungalow 8 did not include Janet.

Let’s be charitable and venture a guess that Janet declined the invitation hoping to avoid catching that mysterious "old lady"/zombie arms disease.

Read it for yourself.

This is either enviable and admirable, or it’s gross. We can’t decide.

According to the New York Post Bruce Willis has been up to the following shenanigans.

"At the after-party for his movie premiere Friday night, at Spotlive Live in Times Square, Willis was spotted "flirting and leaving with a gorgeous young blonde." Our spy said he picked her up "right in front of [his 18-year-old daughter] Rumer Willis." On Sunday, the bald bachelor held court with a table of "20-something models" while celebrating Petra Nemcova’s birthday at the Gramercy Park Hotel – again with his daughter looking on.

Maybe his daughter thinks it’s cool. It’s hard to tell what it might be like. We never palled around with our hot-at-50, action-movie-hero single dad when we were 18.

Maybe it would be all, like, yippee-ki-yay, and stuff.

Yea…no.

Final verdict? Ewwwww…