I had no idea it was possible for a stick girl to get pregnant. I thought rubbing two sticks together would start a fire. Here’s more:

NOW that she’s pregnant, Nicole Richie is getting hitched, too. The tiny "Simple Life" star and her boyfriend, Joel Madden, showed up for the YSL Pool Party to benefit Center Dance Arts at the Beverly Hills Hotel on Thursday night – and she was conspicuously wearing a huge diamond engagement ring. "It was one big rock surrounded by more diamonds," our source said. Richie refused to talk about the ring. Meanwhile, Madden was "overly attentive to her – keeping his arm around her all night – and repeatedly asked her if she was OK." The cozy couple ate everything on their plates, lobster salad and lamb, but refused all alcohol, which our snarky spy called "a first for her."

We all know this isn’t going to end well for Joel or the baby. To see the pictures of Nicole pregnant click here.

We’ve been talking about the rumor that Nicole Richie is pregnant, but now we’ve got pictures that are hard to deny. From every angle, even the side, Richie does look pregnant. The bad girls of Hollywood appear to be all bark and no bite. When faced with the consequences of their actions, like Richie’s second DUI which requires mandatory jail time, these girls will go to rehab (Lindsay Lohan and Britney Spears), break down crying and throw a fit (Paris Hilton), or get pregnant (Nicole Richie). Maybe they should try not breaking the law.

Richie may be shocked to learn that it is not that uncommon for women to have their babies in jail. Just imagine those pictures. It’s almost impossible to believe that Richie will even be able to carry a baby to term with no meat on her bones. It’s sick that anyone (Joel Madden) would even have sex with her.

Richie might as well have a kid because her coffee table is wobbly and she needs something to stick under the leg. She’ll only be pregnant long enough to stay out of jail. Afterwards, she’ll either have an abortion or “fall” on a coat hanger. With long odds that she tries to vomit up the baby. It is in her tummy after all.

The third scenario involves Nicole Richie wearing the the most magical push-up bra in all the world. It’s been widely reported that Richie is pregnant. 

Regardless, her boobs look great.

There are no sources confirming or any reps communicating off-the-record, so we’re going to go out on a limb and assert that she merely looks pregnant and that both she and Joel Madden definitely look really happy and healthy. Awwwww….

Knowing what we know about Richie’s frame and weight, it’s just hard to believe that she’s sporting a plump rack like that without the help of the first-trimester titty fairy.

And, frankly, Nic just doesn’t seem like the breast-augmentation type, though I hope the two of them are thoroughly enjoying her newfound curves.

Check it out, decide for yourself, but if she’s in the family way and the ta-tas are the visual confirmation, congratulations to Joel and Nicole.

The gift is in the mail as soon as your reps confirm the big news.