Since this is the day Vanessa Hudgens nude pictures hit the Internet, it’s time to release those nude pictures of Vanessa Minnillo. These pictures were taken while Minnillo was on vacation with Nick Lachey in Mexico in July. Someone scanned the pictures, and now here they are. I would rather have used the HQ pictures since these make Minnillo look a bit chubby.

Question: What do you call a bounty hunter looking for Minnillo?

Find out the answer after the jump…

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Apparently they’ll let any boy-bander turned…turned what…what does he do these days anyway? Well, Nick Lachey is opening a new restaurant in Vegas. Us Magazine reports:

A source tells Us the singer, 33, is opening an American-style restaurant, Company American Bistro, at Las Vegas’ Luxor Hotel & Casino, in partnership with Pure Management Group. His co-owners? Nicky Hilton, 23, and Wilmer Valderrama, 27.

Their specialty? Douche a L’Orange.

OK! magazine has paid almost half-a-million dollars to buy the uncensored pictures of Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minillo having sex in a hot tub in Mexico, but don’t expect to see them any time soon. The celebrity friendly magazine bought them to keep them off the market and to make sure no one else could publish them. The Daily News says:

OK! shelled out $400,000 for sex photographs and accompanying video of Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo. "There’s much worse stuff than what got out there on the Internet," says a snitch. "If Nick’s fans saw it all, it would definitely change his career, because he kind of has a squeaky-clean image."

But don’t expect to see any steamy pics in the mag’s pages.

In accordance with their celebrity-friendly policy and recent Lachey-Minnillo cover story, OK! shelled out the money to take the material off the market, says a source.

Perhaps the reason Nick doesn’t want the X rated pictures of him boning Vanessa is because this time last year, Jessica Simpson was quoted as saying, "Nick didn’t pack too well if you know what I mean, but I got over it." She also said, "Nick’s small package was a problem sometimes, like the first time we had sex, to tell you the truth, I didn’t really feel much, I faked the whole thing, I really felt sorry for him, I still loved him though." Maybe he should just make an unauthorized sex tape and budget some money for CGI to enhance his package. Without sex pictures, or a tape, Nick is as exciting as watching grass grow.

If or when those pictures finally surface you’ll find them here, with Nick’s little package magnified.

Nick Lachey is an evil genius who found a way to avoid embarrassing questions about giving it to his filipina hooker girlfriend Vanessa Minnillo while on vacation in Mexico. Somehow Nick just sat there, then pulled out some kind of electronic device, and jammed the camera signal. Secret agent Nick has done it again. You may have won this one needle dick Nick, but we’ll be back. Bwahahaha.

That and living well, of course.

You could probably lump making out with the steamy Jake Gyllenhaal into that pile of wonderfulness, too.

Good for you, Jessica Simpson. Keep it up. Be happy.

Pay no attention to your ex-husband blabbing to tabloids about how happy he is, because, let’s face it…nobody cares about Nick Lachey. Without you or Vanessa Minnillo, the guy can’t get arrested in this town, let alone keep attracting magazine covers.