Tyra Banks on the Fat Walk

Tyra Banks was in New York City shooting a commercial promoting the move of her show from Los Angeles to New York. In the title I said she was on the "Fat" "Walk." You see what I did there. I said fat walk without ever calling her fat. It’s implied, but I really don’t think she’s fat. She’s like 5’10", and I’ll bet if you check her BMI you’d find that she’s not overweight. I’m not really turned on by models, but if I think of her as a Tyrannosaurus Rex with those giant thighs and tiny arms, I really start getting hot. Rarr.

Lance Bass Excited to Move Nearer His Incredibly Hot New Boyfriend

Can you believe that Lance Bass was able to land such super hotness? The tanner one in the back is Lance’s new man. You can get a better look at his abs below. Smokin!

Pedro Andrade is quite a looker and the New York Daily News is reporting Bass is giddy about the prospect of residing in the same city as his main squeeze.

We hear ex-boybander Lance Bass is excited to move to New York for his Broadway debut in the exhilarating "Hairspray" because he’ll be in the same town as his new boyfriend, Pedro Andrade, a Brazilian model we’d like to see in a pushup contest with Bass’ Air Force ex Reichen Lehmkuhl. Bass debuted the new man July 4, sipping Ciroc vodka cocktails at the Estate in Sag Harbor.

Bass wins. The cocktail-quaffing-in-the-Hamptons debut of Andrade is so much cooler than Lehmkuhl’s cheek-kissing silliness of a few months back.

And that’s saying a lot.

C’mon, don’t get mad. We all know that Bass was never the coolest of the *N Syncers. Just as he was always the gayest.

Remember his boy-meets-girl-on-the-train movie? Mwah ha ha ha.

What a relief for believable cinema to have Lance out!

People Glosses Over Reports that Madonna Snubbed Janet Jackson

People. com has a little story about the excitement at NYC hotspot Butter the other night. Other outlets (including Page Six) claimed that Madonna notably shined Janet Jackson on, while partying with a number of famous friends.

Of course, it could be senility. Madonna is looking pretty haggard lately.

People is reporting this:

Madonna, Janet Jackson, Shakira, Ashton Kutcher, Demi Moore and others were living it up in the club’s swank banquettes.

Looking comfortable in her créme getup with suspenders hanging at her waist and her hair in a ponytail, Madge made a grand entrance – accompanied by three bodyguards. During her 30-minute visit, her hit "Like a Prayer" was piped over the speakers. Around the same time, Jackson strolled in, looking slim, with her hair pulled back tightly into a pristine bun.

So, it’s established that Madonna and Jackson arrived around the same time.

Then, People details the activities all of these superstars, except Miss Jackson, as well as the movements of Penelope Cruz, David Blaine, and Tony Parker. (What? No Guy Ritchie or Gary Coleman?)

The story ends with: "At around 2:45, the group checked out, continuing their party at Bungalow 8."

Though there’s no actual mention of Madge ignoring the Rhythm Nation artist, one can infer that "the group" that went on to party at Bungalow 8 did not include Janet.

Let’s be charitable and venture a guess that Janet declined the invitation hoping to avoid catching that mysterious "old lady"/zombie arms disease.

Read it for yourself.

Ladies Man Bruce Willis Doesn’t Let Daughter’s Presence Stifle His Game

This is either enviable and admirable, or it’s gross. We can’t decide.

According to the New York Post Bruce Willis has been up to the following shenanigans.

"At the after-party for his movie premiere Friday night, at Spotlive Live in Times Square, Willis was spotted "flirting and leaving with a gorgeous young blonde." Our spy said he picked her up "right in front of [his 18-year-old daughter] Rumer Willis." On Sunday, the bald bachelor held court with a table of "20-something models" while celebrating Petra Nemcova’s birthday at the Gramercy Park Hotel - again with his daughter looking on.

Maybe his daughter thinks it’s cool. It’s hard to tell what it might be like. We never palled around with our hot-at-50, action-movie-hero single dad when we were 18.

Maybe it would be all, like, yippee-ki-yay, and stuff.

Yea…no.

Final verdict? Ewwwww…