Hilary Duff Gives Lap Dance to Boyfriend

It might not sound like earth shattering news to hear that Hilary Duff gave her boyfriend, New York Islanders center Mike Comrie, a lap dance in a bar the other night, but it is. This is like saying Disney will be making X rated films. The Sun reports:

Hilary Duffs fans were left shocked after witnessing the star performing a lap dance over the weekend. The pretty actress treated her ice hockey star boyfriend to the saucy performance at exclusive New York hot spot Tenjune. A partygoer said: "Hilary was having a wild night, drinking Veuve Clicquot straight out of the bottle. She looked nothing like the sweet little Lizzie Maguire she once was as she treated Mike to a series of raunchy lap dances. The place was packed but Hilary didn’t mind."

Alcohol causes women to make more testosterone, which in turn makes them very horny, and easy. Hilary is proud to say she never had sex with Joel Madden, and perhaps that’s because she didn’t drink when they were together. Nicole Richie drinks and look what a slut she turned out to be. Imagine the headache Nicole had when she woke up one morning to find out she was pregnant with Joel’s baby. It’s kind of like having an alien suddenly pop out of your chest, covered in tattoos, just like daddy.

Hilary Duff: The Hockey Groupie

So it looks like little Hilary Duff is hockey fan. The singer/actress has been spotted around town with New York Islanders forward Mike Comrie. Not only is Mr. Comrie a decent player, but he’s also an heir to the Brick Warehouse fortune.

Sadly, no amount of money will fix his lowly Islanders this season, but knowing he’ll be coming home to Hilary after the games might just get him through those long nights.