Lily Allen said she wants to get married and have a baby:

“People think I’m this super confident person who’s all for female empowerment but it’s not true."

“I have every intention of becoming a suburban mum. I want to get married and have children."

“Being followed by the paparazzi is not a life I want.”

"I just hope I can stay famous enough for a little bit so someone rich will marry me."

"That’s all I really care about these days."

"It’s a great job, but it doesn’t leave time for what’s important."

"Like having a family. I’d like to live in the country and have a walled garden, and chickens and pigs."

Haven’t you tried that already Lily? We saw pictures of you smoking while pregnant, and we suspect you could have been drinking too, but we don’t know for sure. We do know you had a miscarriage, and you might have caused it with your bad habits. We can’t imagine Lily having children, unless she gives birth, and a nanny takes care of the kids.

Lily just seems too lazy to handle a busy married life with children. Stick to what you do best Lily, drink until you fall down, smoke like a chimney, fight with the paparazzi, work when you feel like it, and complain about how hard your privileged life is.

There’s a lot Lily will need to change before she should ever consider having kids.

Habitual whiner Lily Allen (24) broke into tears onstage in Helsinki, Finland. Allen blamed the emotional outburst on pain killers for back pain from a fall the night before.

Prior to the performance, Lily tweeted on Twitter:

"Fell over badly last night and I’ve really f***** my back up. Just had an injection in my bum. How am I gonna get through tonight’s gig?"

Was the fall the result of drinking too much?

Lily told the crowd:

"I feel a bit emotional tonight and if I cry it’s not because of you but because of me."

Lily needs a life coach to help her get over her low self esteem. You’re a singing star Lily. Life is good, embrace it. You’re making your own life miserable just to constantly play the victim.

Lily Allen performed her single The Fear on The Late Show with David Letterman last night, and she wasn’t drunk. Lily said she performs better drunk, but she sang live without alcohol, and we thought she sounded better than usual.

Keep up the sober performances Lily.

Lily Allen was supposed to meet fans after her show at In the Venue in Salt Lake City, Utah, on Wednesday evening for a VIP "meet and greet" for her fans. Unfortunately for fans Lily had to be carried from the event by her security guard, sometime after 11 p.m. A witness said:

"The guard later came back to let the guests waiting know that she was not feeling well and would not be returning. Lily was curled up in his arms, head on his shoulder and feet dangling."

The guard also informed those gathered that they would have to leave the area.

Lily recently said she likes to be drunk when she performs, because she can perform better drunk. Sounds like a typical alcoholic excuse. Lily’s other excuse for drinking is that she’s just enjoying her youth. How long before Lily runs out of excuses, and finally admits she’s an alcoholic in need of rehab?

Lily Allen sat down with Jimmy Kimmel last evening to talk about how much trouble she gets into, and about Lindsay Lohan jumping up on stage with her.

Lindsay is the joke of Hollywood. Nice work getting people to take you seriously Lindsay.