David Letterman correctly labels Lauren Conrad an idiot, but an idiot with money. Does Lauren have a voice that sounds a lot like Lindsay Lohan?

Q: Do you know what the difference is between Lauren and Lindsay?

A: Lauren is still working.

Audrina Patridge and Heidi Montag spent the day last week shopping at The Grove in Los Angeles. I wonder if Lauren Conrad stealing boyfriends came up.

Audrina Patridge was on Ellen, and she finally reveals that Lauren Conrad really did hook up with Audrina’s boyfriend Justin Bobby. Audrina says that after December she may stop appearing on the show.

Audrina even gave Ellen a treat in the video below, when she put on a bikini and got in the dunk tank. That water looks cold.

Last year Lauren Conrad was getting paid an estimated $10,000 to $20,000 per episode. This year it’s a lot more. In Touch listed the salaries for each cast member of The Hills non-reality reality show:

• Lauren Conrad: $75,000 per episode
• Heidi Montag: $65,000 per episode
• Spencer Pratt: $65,000 per episode
• Audrina Patridge: $35,000 per episode
• Whitney Port: $20,000 per episode
• Brody Jenner: $10,000 per episode
• Lauren Bosworth: $10,000 per episode
• Stephanie Pratt: $8,000 per episode

In Touch says and insider said:

“The only reason L.C. gets paid more than anyone else is because she demanded in her original contract that no one could ever get paid more than her.”

Lauren can thank Heidi and Spencer constantly whoring themselves in the media for helping to boost all of their salaries, and attract more attention for The Hills.

Mary-Kate Olsen made it clear, when she appeared on David Letterman, that she doesn’t like Spencer Pratt, whom she went to high school with. Now we know why.

Spencer Pratt sold a picture of Mary-Kate Olsen drunk for $50,000. Spencer spilled the beans in an interview:

“Basically, I made it, like, my mission to try to go on a date with every girl on The Hills,” says [Spencer Pratt] who will proudly tell you he made $50,000 in high school by selling a photo he took of Mary-Kate Olsen drinking at a party. Pratt ended up “falling in love” with one of the Hills girls, Heidi Montag. Their drama dominates the current season.

Spencer has made a living selling secrets about everyone else, like the rumors he spread about Lauren Conrad. Spencer better watch his back, because one day he’ll make a mistake and someone else will sell him out, like Heidi Montag.