Joe Simpson was at the one place every would see him, the Ivy. He brought along Russian pop star An’ya. This is some true whoring. We’ve already reported that Joe is looking for some hot tail, and An’ya appears to be willing to do anything to get publicity. Gross.

According to the New York Post, Joe Simpson, a former preacher, and Tina Simpson haven’t been spotted together in months, and Joe has been acting like a single man. Joe was spotted in Austin, Texas at a party without his wedding ring on. A source said:

"He was flirting with one group of girls who either didn’t know who he was or didn’t care, and just grabbed their drinks, laughed and walked away."

Those girls already have a daddy, and they’ve probably heard how Joe is always talking about his daughters in a creepy way.

Tony Romo lost a football game last season because he was distracted by Jessica Simpson, but that hasn’t impressed Joe Simpson, who doesn’t seem to like Tony at all. Joe came between Nick Lachey and Jessica, and now it looks like he’s going to come between any man who tries to marry his daughters. Daddy wants to be the only man in his daughters’ lives.

Jessica Simpson and Eva Longoria were reportedly fighting because Eva was nice to Jessica’s ex John Mayer. In fact, Page Six reports:

"When her close pal Jessica Simpson got wind that Longoria was hanging with Simpson’s ex, John Mayer, the other night at Gold Bar on Broome Street, she "went nuts," said an insider. "When Jessica heard that Eva was being friendly and polite to John, she called her a back-stabber and was furious."

A rep for Simpson denies the fight, but you know Jessica is petty like that. She’s a whore, but she wants to own her guys at the same time. Fruity as a fruit cake.

There’s also a report that Jessica was told she would win an Oscar if she did a movie where she takes off all her clothes. A source said:

"Jessica is in the running for a role that, if she gets it, will put her right on the map in terms of acting. The only hitch is that the script requires a number of quite graphic scenes including a full-frontal nude scene. Jessica is so desperate to land the role and get the industry’s respect that she’s ready to go against her better judgement, and her family, by agreeing to bare all."

Everyone has already seen Jessica nude in Hollywood, except for me, so really this isn’t that much of a stretch for her. Like when she goes on blind dates, she just shows up naked otherwise she’d never make it to second or third base. The dumb blond thing is such a turn off so she’s got to pull out the big guns. Joe Simpson apparently turned down the offer for Jessica saying:

"The last script that came to us was for Jessica to be a porn star. We were promised we would win an Oscar with that. I told them, ’I think we’ll just buy a statue of a little man and keep our clothes on.’ "

Porn star acting is what Jessica does all the time, she’s perfect for that business. She probably really believed those people when they said she’d win an Oscar if she took her clothes off. It’s not that hard to get her naked. All a guy has to say is "FREE WILLIE."

Thanks to papa Joe Simpson, Tony Romo and Jessica Simpson are now banging with daddy’s approval. A source said:

"Joe and Tony have been friendly for a while. Joe is a huge Dallas Cowboy fan, and Tony has always had a crush on her – he even said on his Web site like a year ago that it was his dream to date her. Jessica has been in Nashville and Dallas recording her new country album. When Tony found out, he called Joe and said, ’I know she’s not dating anyone right now, can I take her out for a drink at least?’ Jessica said it was OK for Joe to give Tony her number and they hit it off. They’ve been dating for a couple of weeks now, and Jessica is so happy. She’s been texting everyone about how great he is."

Romo even joined the Simpsons in Waco, Texas, for Thanksgiving. A rep for Simpson declined to comment on her personal life but said, "She is happily recording her country album." Romo has been linked to Carrie Underwood, Sophia Bush and an unidentified Dallas brunette.

Joe also said John Mayer "has always had a crush on her." Scripted.