Ex-Hollywood publicist Jonathon Jaxson says Jake Gyllenhaal is gay and has been in a relationship with Chris Fischer for years. He even says the pair are expecting a child with a surrogate mother together, and Jake will be coming out soon. Here’s more:

Jake Gyllenhaal has been dating the same guy for years. Last year Jake and his bf were arrested and brought into the West Hollywood station after the sheriffs office was called after catching Jake and his bf having sex in an SUV behind the restaurant Chin Chins in LA. Both were later released.

Jake has been dating this guy for years, even before he broke up with Kirsten Dunst. Kirsten Dunst found out about his bf and confronted him at Chateau Marmont. The confrontation was loud and they broke up right there. News of their break-up followed a few days later. Jake and his bf are currently expecting a baby through a surrogate. They used a company based in Westwood, CA. The baby is due in September.

The job of the celebrity gossip columnist is to write about well known facts in Hollywood, but to present them as BREAKING or SHOCKING secrets being exposed. Although scientists knew for years, imagine how people reacted when they found out the moon doesn’t actually produce its own light, rather it reflects light from the sun.

Reese Witherspoon picked up Jake Gyllenhaal at his Hollywood Hills home, and raced off to her place. Looks like the breakup rumors were just a diversion. Kids must be with daddy today, so now momma can play. Divorces can be frustrating, and what better way to get your frustrations out?

That and living well, of course.

You could probably lump making out with the steamy Jake Gyllenhaal into that pile of wonderfulness, too.

Good for you, Jessica Simpson. Keep it up. Be happy.

Pay no attention to your ex-husband blabbing to tabloids about how happy he is, because, let’s face it…nobody cares about Nick Lachey. Without you or Vanessa Minnillo, the guy can’t get arrested in this town, let alone keep attracting magazine covers.

We kinda believed the many Jessica Simpson-is-dating-X-celeb stories were publicity stunts cooked up by Papa Joe to divert attention from her soon-to-be box-office bomb.

There were inklings that the romance rumors rearing up could be a reaction to the Nick Lachey, Vanessa Minnillo soft-core snaps that were making headlines.

But…now there is a picture. Sure, it’s not ironclad proof of the reported canoodling at the Prince show, but it’s interesting. More interesting than Dane Cook’s "comedy" and definitely more interesting than Jess’s "acting" or even her attempts at "singing."

We’d been sitting on the rampant Jessica Simpson dating rumors this week. They just didn’t smell right.

If one believes all the stories showing up in newspapers and online, she’s a busy little thing. Maybe that 5 Factor Diet gives her extra energy, in addition to leaving her super cut and steely.

This week alone we’ve got stories swirling that Dane Cook and Jess were seen canoodling at the Prince concert at the Hollywood Roosevelt.

Later, reports surfaced that at that same purple concert, she was seen romantically accompanied trainer to the stars Harley Pasternak, who is responsible for the fitness program cited for Simpson’s rapid physical transformation.

Now…the buzz about Jake Gyllenhaal and Jess having mutual crushes on each other is building to a crescendo with reports that they’re already in love, and that she visited him at the Beverly Wilshire a couple weeks ago.

Next thing you know there will be pregnancy claims or pending adoptions. Whatever it takes to divert our attention from the stench coming from Simpson’s rotting movie, Bombed…oops… Blonde Ambition.

What we actually smell is a rat.

A publicity-hound rat.

Around here, we call that spotlight-seeking rodent Papa Joe.

Wonder what’s next. A surprise reunion with John Mayer. How about tales of a threesome with Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo?