This illustration from Pretty On The Outside captures the spirit of Paris Hilton’s escape to Hawaii.

Page Six is reporting that Hilton’s time in Hawaii was filled with the same antics we’ve learned to loathe, with Hilton in cahoots with the paparazzi and snubbing the locals.

"The paparazzi told us that Paris calls them herself," said a different source, who claimed a lensman told him, "We love her. She lets us know where she’s going to be so we can take as many pictures as we want."

The Four Seasons guest reinforced that impression, noting, "She was shopping at the Wailea concourse, strutting around, posing for the cameras. It was disgusting."

But Hilton didn’t tell the paparazzi what she was doing at night. "She slipped out of the hotel and went to the club at the Hyatt a couple of times," we’re told. "She made friends with a couple of local guys and made out with them there. I guess she didn’t want pictures of herself doing that."

Hilton’s loyal lapdog/publicist Elliot Mintz denies it all, claiming the reports to be a fabrication.

Who are we to believe? A lackey on the Paris payroll. Or the upstanding citizens and tourists of the islands.

Yup. A no-brainer.

Ashley Tisdale was spotted in Hawaii yesterday in a bikini with her dancer boyfriend Jared Murillo, and she shares the same birthday as Lindsay Lohan (she turned 22 yesterday), plus she looks much better in a bikini than Lindsay who looks 50. She was in Disney’s High School Musical, so I guess that kinda makes her famous. More notably, Ashley was the voice for my favorite character of all time, the Lead Blueberry Scout in A Bug’s Life.

Whose Line is it Anyway? star Wayne Brady’s wife, Mandie, has filed for divorce, citing irreconcilable differences.

According to documents filed Friday, Brady, 35, and the former Mandie Taketa, 31, married on April 5, 1999, and separated on that day in 2006.

They have a 4-year-old daughter, Maile. In her petition, Mandie requests joint legal and physical custody. She also requests spousal support, but asks that she and Brady pay their own legal fees.

Brady joined Whose Line in 1996, and from 2002-2004 hosted his own variety program, The Wayne Brady Show, which snagged four Daytime Emmys. Mandie, a former dancer, became a stay-at-home mom after the birth of Maile, whose name is the Hawaiian word for the leaf found in leis.

Source

Nicole Richie and Joel Madden may have put plans for a happy little family on the fast track.

TMZ is passing along a rumor that Richie is "shopping around for a wedding dress … asking stylists for help."

E Online is citing an unnamed Richie close friend who confirmed that the star of The Simple Life is, indeed, pregnant.

Terrific timing, too. If she can just find the perfect dress and get this wrapped up before her July 11 trial date, perhaps she’ll petition for spousal conjugal visits.

Maybe Paris Hilton is helping out by scouting Hawaii locales for a quickie, post-clink honeymoon.

Paris Hilton is taking a brief vacation from her "telling lies" after jail promo tour. She landed in Maui with a an outfit designed to make her look more holy. The more fake Paris looks, the more she just looks like herself. Hopefully the photogs get some good pics of Paris drinking and smoking pot to relax on the beach. She even said herself she was hysterical in jail, and that’s because she doesn’t know how to relax without drugs, which could be how she was able to make it through the rest of her jail time. Prescription drugs could be Paris’ new best friends. Once Paris returns from Maui she will be putting in more beach time.

Entertainment Tonight learned that Paris Hilton is renting a house in Malibu. It’s a $2.9 million little pad for her to enjoy for the summer. After her cramped jail cell, she’ll be able to stretch her legs a bit more in the two-bedroom, three-bath, 2,258-square foot house on the beach, where she plans on spending her time as she revamps her image and gets to work on new projects. ET chatted with Hilton’s manager, Jason Moore, and revealed that the heiress is going to be a very busy woman now that she’s back in the business of being Paris. He adds that Paris has an “incredible work schedule” ahead of her over the next several months, with launches of perfume and other products.

Paris is weak. She’ll be a train wreck by the end of the year.