Rosie O’Donnell Kicked the Crap Out of Herself

Rosie O’Donnell’s opening her giant pie hole (and cake hole, and nachos hole, and pizza hole) again, but this time it’s about something we like to hear…her beating herself up.

Although it is her unkind treatment of former employer Barbara Walters in the pages of Rosie O’Donnell’s upcoming memoir, Celebrity Detox, that has been generating headlines, the former "Queen of Nice" also bashes herself in her book – literally.

As a child growing up on New York’s Long Island, O’Donnell, now 45, would fracture her own limbs with "a baseball bat" or a "wooden hanger," she reveals in the book, reports The Insider.

In the excerpt, first revealed in Roger Friedman’s FoxNews.com column, O’Donnell writes that in choosing what to break she’d go for "My hands and fingers usually. No one knew. My secret."

Seeking to explain her motivation for the self-destructive act, she reportedly writes, "Proof that I had some value, enough to be fixed."

She adds later, "There were many benefits to having a cast. In the middle of the night, it was a weapon." Why she would need a weapon in the middle of the night is not addressed, Friedman reports.

Perhaps it was to fight off the bed bugs that fed off her fat…just a thought.

Tommy Lee and Kid Rock Offered Ring and $1 Million Prize to Fight

This opportunity raises burning questions. Will it be pay-per-view?

Will Pamela Anderson referee?

Will she be naked? Or just mostly naked?

According to Page Six:

VEGAS lounge impresario Jeff Beacher wants to settle the score between Tommy Lee and Kid Rock once and for all - with a winner-take-all $1 million boxing match between Pamela Anderson’s exes.

"We all know that they are fighting over Pam Anderson," said Beacher. "What better way to settle their differences then to slug it out in the ring!"

We’ve seen the video.

We’ve suffered through the diatribe.

We’re tired of these losers.

The real question is: How should we place our bets if we’re hoping they both end up beaten to a pulp?

Tommy Lee Strikes Back at Kid Rock a Day Late

Tommy Lee, who was on the receiving end of all the smacks and slaps during the 15-second "fight" started by Kid Rock at the Video Music Awards, is getting his licks in all modern-style like, by posting his story on his Web site.

Here, in all of its misspelled-and-dot-dot-dot-dot-ridden glory, is the Tommy Lee smack down. With words, people. With words.

Take THAT Kid "Pebble."

Yeah!! …..here I am minding my own biz having a great time with my friend Criss Angel (magician) and watching the MTV awards in the front row saying hello to all my friends……Pamela comes and sits on my lap who I love and adore….and also say hello to my friend Travis Barker and his wife!…..and i get a text from another friend P. Diddy and he says come sit with me…..and he’s sitting with Miss HOT Megan FOX so I go over and sit with P! Not a minute later and Alicia Keys starts her amazing performance….("I apologize sweetie…..I had nothing to do with the timing and disrespect")……back to the stupid-ness!!….so….. I get a tap on the shoulder from Kid Pebble…I stand up and embrace him with a semi hug and say "Hey dude…What up"?? He punches me in the face…..well if ya wanna call it that!?….more like a bitch slap!…….Wuss!! Anyway….i go to knock this jealous country bumpkin the f$%k OUT….and before I can have a meeting with my fist and his ugly a** mug ….security guards… grab me and haul my a** outta the award show! So I’m fine and of course leave to my room with police and owner of the Palm’s George Maloof……the rest is paper work and bullsh*#%!… Anyway…… I would like to apologize to Alicia and George and MTV for the disrespectful bull*#% caused by a piece of *#% called Kid Pebble!!

Much Love always!!…..Tommy!!

How could Pamela Anderson ever leave this mental giant? All other men must just pale in comparison.

And, yeah, we edited the bad words as if the Internet is a comic strip, but we just wanted to make sure we didn’t offend your delicate sensibilities with Tommy’s raw rock-and-roll communication.

Tommy Lee. He’s raw!

Pamela Anderson Looked Extra Plastic-y at 2007 MTV VMA

Maybe it was the stress of her two class-act ex-husbands throwing down in front of the cameras.

Perhaps it’s just the unforgiving glare of the flash on some errant fan’s digital camera.

Who knows … but in this pic of Pamela Anderson with Kanye West last night, she quite strongly resembles a slutty Barbie doll.

We know. We know. But, this time she resembles a slutty Barbie doll, or blow-up doll, or tranny, even more than usual.

The thin, arched, painted-on eyebrows.

The waxy complexion.

The plastic hair.

Now all we need is one of our brothers to swoop in, tear off her head and hang the body from the chain-link fence out back and it will be just like our childhoods.

Good times.

Video of Tommy Lee and Kid Rock Fighting

Hilarious! It didn’t take long for Diddy and Jamie Foxx to make fun of the ridiculous altercation between Pamela Anderson’s famous exes.

Foxx’s "Let stop all of this white-on-white crime" could be quote of the week!

You can watch video of Tommy Lee and Kid Rock getting into it and the verbal jabs of the other celebs here.

MTV reports the following details of the dust up:

According to eyewitnesses, Lee — sitting at the same table as Diddy — jawed at Rock as he made his way toward the Bad Boy CEO, with whom he was supposed to present the show’s final performance.

It wasn’t clear exactly what Lee said to Rock, but apparently after his words, Rock slapped the drummer, according to eyewitnesses. Lee, one eyewitness said, attempted to fight back but, before he was able to land a blow, was punched in the face by Rock …

Security quickly detained both men, with Lee being immediately removed from the venue. Rock, with his cigar still in his mouth, was held back momentarily until Lee left and calmly walked out alongside security.

"I never hit nobody for nothing before," Rock was overhead saying in the lobby of the casino. "I told him to shut the f— up."

It’s being reported that although they didn’t detain him, Las Vegas Police did cite Kid Rock with misdemeanor battery. Apparently, the police allowed him to stick around and watch the rest of the show, too, though Tommy Lee - the “victim” of said battery - was kicked out.