Items owned by Elvis Presley are currently being auctioned at gottahaverockandroll.com. One item that caught our attention was a poem Elvis wrote about a Robin.

The poem starts out sweet, and ends with Elvis crushing his skull.

So far the bidding for this poem is up to $20,035.20.

Michael Jackson has a $23 loan for Neverland Ranch, but owes $212,963 in interest on the loan’s principal, so the property is going back to the bank. Once Jackson had bragged to Elvis he would be a bigger star and richer, but it looks like Elvis wins because he’s richer even now dead, than Jackson is alive. Neverland probably still haunts Michael’s nightmares. I doubt he ever wants to see that place again.

To date Garth Brooks has sold 123 million units to top Elvis. That’s amazing. Garth may be the king of country, but Elvis will always be the king of rock-n-roll.

Britneyexperts.com says that Britney Spears finished filming her Get Back video yesterday, and it was poorly thought out. It’s so easy to make fun of the mentally challenged. Here’s more:

Our insider told us that the music video is unlike anything Britney Spears has done before, pointing out that the video has a very eclectic feel to it with a lot of vintage elements. In one of the sets, there’s a drawing of Elvis on the wall and a little bit further down is one of Britney. There is also a night club set.

Our insider says: “Not many people know how long this music video has been in pre-production. The entire concept behind the music video, which I cannot talk about, was entirely Britney’s idea, and this is the first time that she has been involved in it as early as the story board process, all the way to the production design and the casting as well. The only thing I can say is that this video is about “rebirth”. She also did all the choreography for it. This is her baby and is excited for all her fans to see it when it airs. She has been working extremely hard even though many fail to give her credit for it.”

Britney would be a lot more entertaining if she’d spice things up a bit. She needs a tattoo on each butt cheek, one that says "butter", the other says "parkay." Elvis and Britney do have something in common, their love for fried chicken smothered in butter. Once this video, and album fail, Britney won’t be able to call the next one "rebirth" since she already used that, so maybe it’ll be the "extreme makeover" album. In the video Britney will be slowly waddling on a treadmill, sweating on a bike without peddling, getting on a fat scale, and crying when they taking away her tootsie rolls. After that fails maybe she’ll try making it as a porn actress in fat videos. Just sprinkle some baby powder all over and find the wet spots.

According to Page Six, John Stamos won’t be welcome Down Under again any time soon–and, no, that’s not a euphemism. Some local news correspondents speculated that Uncle Jesse might have been "in the cups" during interviews on several TV shows in Australia.

The "ER" star was called "bleary-eyed, staggering and slurring," as well as "tired and emotional," by a Sydney newspaper after appearing on several TV shows in a highly disheveled state. Interviewer Kerri-Ann Kennerley noted, "It was a bit like he’d perhaps come from a hotel minibar." In one memorable moment, Stamos likened himself to Elvis Presley and Princess Diana, quipping: "Who else has died? My career after coming to Australia." He later blamed his weird state on jet lag.

Jet lag? Really? Even Paula Abdul could have come up with a better excuse than that, my friend. How about you put down the dirty martini next time and throw another shrimp on the barbie? Still, I wouldn’t kick him outta bed for eating garlic olives. I’m jussayin’.

Source