Pete Wentz and Ashlee Simpson Use Lindsay Lohan’s Water Bottle Trick

Why, just yesterday we were talking about how Evian might want to go ahead and ship Lindsay Lohan that free bottled water she’s requested and perhaps tweak their marketing to capitalize on her sneaky habits.

Today, the New York Daily News has reports of the Fall Out Boy bassist and the resculpted younger Simpson pulling a potential green-bottled contender into the mix.

It sure looked like Pete Wentz had a sober weekend - the Fall Out Boy bassist drank only Fuji water during Saturday night’s dinner at the Stereo House in Water Mill. "He’s never been a huge drinker," said one pal, "but now it’s cold turkey." Strange, then, that later as he manned the turntables at the Hpnotiq party at Dune in Southampton, girlfriend Ashlee Simpson decanted Veuve Clicquot into an empty Perrier bottle for him. As Wentz sipped in the deejay booth, a fellow emcee announced, "Look at our man Wentz. He’s drinking Perrier; that’s all he drinks."

Perrier…the better to disguise the sparkles in your champagne.

Fuji…for hiding the vodka, if you hate the French.

Paris Hilton Claims That She’s ‘Not A Big Drinker”

Paris Hilton’s Larry King Interview was chock full of nuggets, but perhaps none better than this little gem:

"I’m just not a big drinker. I’m not really into it."

Really, folks. She said it. In Paris’ defense, she may honestly not remember that she has ever had a drink. She probably doesn’t even remember why she was in prison. It’s a miracle that she didn’t forget where she was halfway through the interview and panic.

Paris also claimed in the interview that she has never used drugs. Another likely story. It’s clear that Paris has no interest in developing any kind of honest relationship with either the media or the public. I’ll go out on a limb here and guess that she has learned absolutely nothing for her little stay behind bars.

The good news here is that she will no doubt provide us with years of boneheaded behavior to make us all feel like bona fide geniuses.