This just in: Britney Spears may not be stable. Okay, putting all sarcasm aside (or at least some sarcasm), the troubled pop princess has reportedly upped the crazy bar once again.

Stories are swirling around about Britney’s manic behavior on the set of her recent OK! Magazine photo shoot. Rumor has it little miss Spears was acting extremely paranoid, taking a suspicious number of bathroom breaks, and used Chanel and Gucci dresses to wipe up such lovely messes as her greasy hands from the fried chicken she insisted on ordering, and…get this…her dog’s mess on the floor. Now, that’s some good crazy.

Sadly, OK! is claiming they can’t release the photos because they are so unflattering. But don’t worry, someone will undoubtedly release them on the ‘net.

What does this mean for Britney’s career? Absolutely nothing. The nice thing about never having had any kind of tangible credibility is that you don’t have anything to lose. Brit can just do what she wants and let the chips fall where they may. What a country!

It’s like a celeb epidemic. Angelina Jolie, Victoria Beckham and now Madonna blatantly dictating which questions are forbidden during interviews.

Leave it to Madge to take it one crazy step further, according to MSNBC.

“Eye contact must be maintained at all times,” interviewers were told, according to the London Mirror. “Never look down to check notes — all questions must be memorized or the interview will be terminated.”

“We thought her people were just joking,” a source told the paper. “But it soon became apparent that they were deadly serious.”

Interviewers were also given a list of questions they were not allowed to ask: no inquiries about the state of her marriage to director Guy Ritchie, about their adoption of a Malawian child, or about her religion, Kabbalah.

“She did not want to do any interviews, which I told the Live Earth folks from the start,” Madonna’s rep told The Scoop, adding that she didn’t know about any backstage demands.

Of course she didn’t know, or she wouldn’t admit it. What rep wants to be linked to this kind of nutty stuff?

Eye contact? Memorizing questions in advance? Forbidding journalists from looking down at their notes?

Feel sorry for those reporters. Have you seen Madonna lately? She’s scary like Medusa. The correspondents probably feared they’d be turned to stone.

Like a stringer statue garden, backstage at Wembley.

Gotta love Lily Allen. She just tells it like it is, even about herself! We like this so much better than when she’s whining on MySpace.

The latest pearls about Paris Hilton, the Sun is reporting, are howlers:

"I think Paris is amazing. I mean she’s hideous, but I think she’s amazing at the same time.

"I love her. I think The Simple Life is genius. I can never figure out if she plays up to it or not.”

It’s not the first time feisty Lil has taken a pot shot at the blonde heiress.

She once labelled her "useless and hideously untalented" and suggested people who bought her debut album should be killed off.

The Smile singer also rubbished her rival Amy Winehouse’s singing ability.

She added: “I think she has a cool voice. But saying that, I don’t think it’s her real voice.”

An Amy/Lily street battle to the death may not be a stretch, though it could go either way. Winehouse will either come out swinging, or retreat into private to cut herself.

Tune in tomorrow, when Lily Allen might claim that she was drunk when she did this interview because she’s an alcoholic. Or that she was talking crazy because she was weak from an eating disorder brought on by Hollywood’s unrealistic expectations. Or that she just had PMS.

All revelations are possible with loose-cannon Allen.

It never happened. That’s what Bruce Willis has to say about those rumors that he and Lindsay Lohan had a short-lived "thing."

In an interview with the Mirror, Willis concedes that he has a rakish image and that his denials of hanky-panky with Firecrotch will fall on deaf ears.

“Here’s what you have to know,” he says with a hint of exasperation. “I don’t pay attention to the gossip anymore. I don’t look at it or let it in my house. We could go down to a newsstand right now and find five stupid things that are written about me, but I just don’t care.

“I stopped fighting it when I was a young kid and I was trying to find my way, just flailing wildly, figuring out how to handle fame. Setting the record straight… I couldn’t care less. Because no matter how many times I tell you I had nothing to do with Lindsay Lohan and never laid a finger on her – she just hung out with my younger daughter Tallulah for a minute – it’s still gonna be set in stone. It’s out of my control.”

Bruce, we believe you. Really.

In the time that has passed since those rumors were hot, we’ve learned that Lindsay was raised by a liar, that she has delusions of influential connections to an ex-Vice President, and that she can’t spell the word adequate.

Her alleged claims – and then public denials – that the two of you were hitting it off seem less convincing now than ever.

We’re just glad that rehab has reduced said Lohan hook-up claims. We’re bracing for the new wave of Lindsay-finds-love stories we’ll soon have to post.

And it makes our fingers cry.

Page Six is reporting that Lindsay Lohan’s new rehab friend, the NYC check-pilferer Dori Cooperman, isn’t exactly being welcomed with open arms by the Firecrotch Faithful. They’re on to her plans and watching her maneuver to cement her relationship with her new BFF.

In all of the oceanfront photos and videos of Lohan’s party, one face keeps popping up: that of Cooperman, who extended her own rehab stay at Promises in a cheesy bid to befriend the center’s highest-profile resident, some of her New York pals say…

…Us Weekly will run the exclusive snaps in its next issue, Lohan’s rep confirmed. "Dori will be just thrilled to see her face in Us Weekly," sniped one partygoer. "Lindsay’s been warned about her. Right now, she’s being really nice and friendly to everybody, but everyone knows what Dori’s agenda is."

What exactly would the agenda be? Either Lohan is recovered or she isn’t.

So Cooperman either plans to scrap her own sobriety and ride the crazy coke-fueled train that is Lohan’s downward spiral to its inevitably tragic destination.

Or she’s already at work learning card games and scouting out the coolest Hollywood Bingo Parlors to frequent with her boring ginger-haired pal.

Dori, you little mailbox thief, has it really come to this?