Lindsay Lohan has denied the police version of events to Access Hollywood’s concerned Billy Bush.

When Billy e-mailed Lohan asking if everything was OK and if there was anything she wanted him to get out there for her, she responded, "Yes. I am innocent… did not do drugs they’re not mine. I was almost hit by my assistant Tarin’s mom. I appreciate everyone giving me my privacy."

Time to take bets on how long it will take before Tarin’s mom provides her exclusive story. Whether she did "almost hit" the self-destructive Lohan or not, the details leading up to the arrest are sure to be juicy.

We expect the tale will include slapping and hair-pulling, curses and threats.

And that’s probably just the stuff they witnessed Lindsay doing to herself.

Despite reports that the police were called by a person allegedly being chased by drug-crazed, intoxicated, SUV-driving Lindsay Lohan the other night, tipsters are indicating that Lohan was the chasee, not the chaser.

Sources connected to Lindsay tell TMZ both Lindsay, who was driving a Denali, and the Escalade in front of her, driven by the mother of Lindsay’s former assistant, were both being chased in a "unsafe and threatening" manner.

We’re told there may have been more than one vehicle chasing the duo, though we do not know the identities of those drivers. We could not confirm if paparazzi were chasing the cars. One thing we do know: there are no known photos of the incidents.

Speculation that the paparazzi were involved is building, but that seems like another convenient excuse. Next we’ll hear that before they chased Lindsay, the paparazzi forced her to shotgun a six-pack and slipped a bag of coke into her front pocket.

Oh…and handcuffed her to the steering wheel and told her that if her speed dipped below 50, a bomb they planted would go off.

Damn photographers.

Uh-oh, Lilo! We knew that Lindsay Lohan’s SCRAM ankle bracelet was a sham!

The arrest happened early this morning and TMZ has been reporting the rapidly changing details. A rundown of the details…in the order it broke, so you can enjoy the ludicrous nature of the Firecrotch downward spiral. We only wish they had pics and video!

According to the L.A. County Sheriff’s Dept., 21-year-old Lohan was nailed around 2:15 AM near Pico Boulevard and Main Street early Tuesday morning.

Lindsay Lohan was popped for possession of cocaine, driving under the influence, transporting a narcotic into a custodial facility and driving on a suspended license. Sources say her blood alcohol level was between .12 and .13, well over the .08 legal limit.

Cops tell TMZ cocaine was found in her pants pocket [during a search at the station].

If convicted, she would almost certainly do time, especially with another possible DUI looming.

Law enforcement now says Lohan was stopped after cops got a call of a vehicle being chased by another vehicle. The chasing vehicle was being driven by Lohan.

Lohan was driving a white Denali. She was chasing a Cadillac Escalade.

Lindsay Lohan is out of jail.

Law enforcement sources say Lohan was cooperative in jail. We’re told she was very upset.

A law enforcement source at the Santa Monica jail tells TMZ "she did just about everything we asked."

…[except] She refused to submit to a PASD — Preliminary Alcohol Screening Device. That’s a chemical test administered in the field to determine blood alcohol levels.

We’re told cops did administer a walk-the-line test, and Lindsay flunked.

The sophisticated SCRAM alcohol monitoring device which Lindsay Lohan voluntarily strapped around her leg wasn’t the reason cops busted her for DUI Thursday morning.

TMZ contacted a rep from the company that monitors the SCRAM bracelet who said, "I didn’t even know she was arrested."

And there you have it folks! If Nicole Richie gets thrown in jail in August, we’ll have a trifecta. Who would have thought that Paris Hilton’s offenses would be the least dramatic.

A coke-fueled, drunken chase in an SUV. You can’t make this stuff up!

Page Six asks: Which hard-partying starlet has figured out a way to get high while wearing an alcohol-monitoring anklet? She was asking where she could score some Ecstasy at a Vegas club the other night.

Lindsay Lohan headed straight to Las Vegas to party after getting out of rehab. Her alcohol-monitoring ankle bracelet doesn’t detect drugs like cocaine, which was reported to have been found in her blood after her DUI. Lindsay could do every other drug on the planet, except alcohol, and she’d still expect everyone to believe she’s clean and sober. Lindsay is a pig, and she loves to roll around in the mud.

Lindsay Lohan partied at PURE night club in Las Vegas over the weekend with Pussycat dolls, and a guy that dressed like her dad. Red Bull and water were strategically placed to make it look like Lindsay is cleaning up her act, and maybe she is. Lindsay was wearing what appeared to be a police issued GPS tracking ankle bracelet. Lindsay might be in more trouble over her cocaine DUI in Beverly Hills than previously thought.

Update: People says:

After more than six weeks in rehab, Lindsay Lohan has completed her stint at Malibu treatment center Promises.

Lohan’s rep released this statement on Sunday: "On Friday, July 13, 2007, Lindsay Lohan successfully completed her 45 days of residential and extended care treatment at Promises. She has transitioned to an intensive outpatient program, which includes attendance at daily AA meetings, outpatient therapy and daily testing. On her own, she has also made the decision in support of her sobriety to wear an alcohol monitoring bracelet. In part she is wearing the bracelet so there are no questions about her sobriety if she chooses to go dancing or dining in a place where alcohol is served."

Rep Leslie Sloane says of her client: "She’s doing great. Lindsay is working hard on her sobriety and we are all supporting her."

The actress (who quietly turned 21 on July 2) had a chance to show off the bracelet – which she wears on her ankle – Saturday night at Pure Nightclub in Las Vegas, where she sipped an energy drink and hung out with about ten friends. Says a clubgoer: "A lot of the attention was placed on Lindsay and she was smiling – really enjoying the evening."

There’s only one problem with this whole fantasy sobriety. Since no one ordered the bracelet, who says anyone is actually checking it?