Chyna was taken to the hospital on Saturday, which was also her birthday. Paramedics were called to her Burbank home around 5 am after friends found her passed out with cuts on her arms. At the hospital Chyna was so drunk a psychiatric evaluation could not be performed until after her blood alcohol level came down.

Chyna said later in the hospital:

"All I really want right now is a hamburger and fries right now."

What a way to spend a birthday.

Joan Marie Laurer is ready to stomp Vince McMahon for what she calls "eight years of making my life a living hell." Today Laurer legally changed her name to Chyna, and she had this to say to Vince:

"Do I want to go back to get abused by you and get punched in the head every day and have people not stand up for me besides the fans? No. Would I like to go back for one day representing myself and all these people to kick your a$$ and your a$$ only? Cause you are the boss, right Vince? Then I would love to do it. You know my number. You know where I live, obviously. And you know my name. Bring it, Vince!"

If Vince accepts Chyna’s offer I’m betting on Chyna, not just to win the match, but to put Vince into a coma. Chyna is more of a man than Vince. I know because I saw a picture of her penis, and it’s bigger than Vince’s.