Uh-oh, Lilo! We knew that Lindsay Lohan’s SCRAM ankle bracelet was a sham!

The arrest happened early this morning and TMZ has been reporting the rapidly changing details. A rundown of the details…in the order it broke, so you can enjoy the ludicrous nature of the Firecrotch downward spiral. We only wish they had pics and video!

According to the L.A. County Sheriff’s Dept., 21-year-old Lohan was nailed around 2:15 AM near Pico Boulevard and Main Street early Tuesday morning.

Lindsay Lohan was popped for possession of cocaine, driving under the influence, transporting a narcotic into a custodial facility and driving on a suspended license. Sources say her blood alcohol level was between .12 and .13, well over the .08 legal limit.

Cops tell TMZ cocaine was found in her pants pocket [during a search at the station].

If convicted, she would almost certainly do time, especially with another possible DUI looming.

Law enforcement now says Lohan was stopped after cops got a call of a vehicle being chased by another vehicle. The chasing vehicle was being driven by Lohan.

Lohan was driving a white Denali. She was chasing a Cadillac Escalade.

Lindsay Lohan is out of jail.

Law enforcement sources say Lohan was cooperative in jail. We’re told she was very upset.

A law enforcement source at the Santa Monica jail tells TMZ "she did just about everything we asked."

…[except] She refused to submit to a PASD — Preliminary Alcohol Screening Device. That’s a chemical test administered in the field to determine blood alcohol levels.

We’re told cops did administer a walk-the-line test, and Lindsay flunked.

The sophisticated SCRAM alcohol monitoring device which Lindsay Lohan voluntarily strapped around her leg wasn’t the reason cops busted her for DUI Thursday morning.

TMZ contacted a rep from the company that monitors the SCRAM bracelet who said, "I didn’t even know she was arrested."

And there you have it folks! If Nicole Richie gets thrown in jail in August, we’ll have a trifecta. Who would have thought that Paris Hilton’s offenses would be the least dramatic.

A coke-fueled, drunken chase in an SUV. You can’t make this stuff up!

Vivica Fox is the next Mel Gibson, only she’s a black drunk woman, who tries to use an accusation of racism to get out of a DUI. Here’s more:

Vivica A. Fox called a state patrol officer a "racist white cop" during her drunken driving arrest and repeatedly failed sobriety tests, according to an official report.

The 42-year-old actress, who is black, was pulled over in March after passing a California Highway Patrol officer who said her Cadillac was doing 80 mph and weaving in its lane on the Hollywood Freeway.

The officer noticed that Fox’s eyes were red and watery and that she had a "strong odor" of alcohol, according to the report. After she failed sobriety tests, he arrested Fox for investigation of driving under the influence.

"Fox began to walk away, yelling at my partner, ’Brother, help a sister, are you going to let this racist white cop do this. … Well, are you?’" according to the report.

Fox continued to speak in a "condescending manner" as she was placed in the patrol car, according to the report. She was taken to the Van Nuys jail, where a breath test was conducted but had to be stopped when she "burped quite loudly," the report said.

Breath tests indicated her blood-alcohol level was greater than .08 percent, California’s legal limit for a driver. She was charged in March with two misdemeanor counts of driving under the influence of alcohol and driving with a blood-alcohol level above the legal limit. Her arraignment was scheduled for July 19.

If convicted, Fox could face six months in jail and a $1,000 fine.

Fox said this month that she had made a "mistake" and would "hire a driver next time."

"It was an unfortunate judgment that I am taking full responsibility in," she said backstage at the Daytime Emmy Awards.

Fox obviously hates white people, and she’s the racist. Calling someone a racist, when they’re not, should be considered a hate crime against an innocent victim. The poor white cop should sue her for making false allegations that could have cost him his career. I’m hoping this "sister" gets that old white judge that did Paris, and she’s not only late to her court date, but she calls him a racist too. She might just spend the full six months in the Phoenix Sheriff’s tent city. The desert heat does not discriminate "sister," and neither did the breathalyzer.

Check him out, yo. Doesn’t he look fly in his mini-kiddie Caddie?

Wonder if it fills the hole in his little toddler heart where his confidence in consistency, safety and nurturing should reside?

The normalcy deck is stacked against Britney’s kids, but they sure are cute.