Uh-oh, Lilo! We knew that Lindsay Lohan’s SCRAM ankle bracelet was a sham!

The arrest happened early this morning and TMZ has been reporting the rapidly changing details. A rundown of the details…in the order it broke, so you can enjoy the ludicrous nature of the Firecrotch downward spiral. We only wish they had pics and video!

According to the L.A. County Sheriff’s Dept., 21-year-old Lohan was nailed around 2:15 AM near Pico Boulevard and Main Street early Tuesday morning.

Lindsay Lohan was popped for possession of cocaine, driving under the influence, transporting a narcotic into a custodial facility and driving on a suspended license. Sources say her blood alcohol level was between .12 and .13, well over the .08 legal limit.

Cops tell TMZ cocaine was found in her pants pocket [during a search at the station].

If convicted, she would almost certainly do time, especially with another possible DUI looming.

Law enforcement now says Lohan was stopped after cops got a call of a vehicle being chased by another vehicle. The chasing vehicle was being driven by Lohan.

Lohan was driving a white Denali. She was chasing a Cadillac Escalade.

Lindsay Lohan is out of jail.

Law enforcement sources say Lohan was cooperative in jail. We’re told she was very upset.

A law enforcement source at the Santa Monica jail tells TMZ "she did just about everything we asked."

…[except] She refused to submit to a PASD — Preliminary Alcohol Screening Device. That’s a chemical test administered in the field to determine blood alcohol levels.

We’re told cops did administer a walk-the-line test, and Lindsay flunked.

The sophisticated SCRAM alcohol monitoring device which Lindsay Lohan voluntarily strapped around her leg wasn’t the reason cops busted her for DUI Thursday morning.

TMZ contacted a rep from the company that monitors the SCRAM bracelet who said, "I didn’t even know she was arrested."

And there you have it folks! If Nicole Richie gets thrown in jail in August, we’ll have a trifecta. Who would have thought that Paris Hilton’s offenses would be the least dramatic.

A coke-fueled, drunken chase in an SUV. You can’t make this stuff up!

Lindsay Lohan has turned herself into police, who arrested and booked her, then released her on $30,000 bail yesterday at about 4 pm. Her booking only took about an hour. Police will only say her blood alcohol level was above the legal 0.08, and had previously said she had both alcohol and cocaine in her blood that was taken at the hospital. Lohan’s lawyers are trying to keep things quiet, but once a plea deal is reached, or the trial is over the details will become public information.

In the picture above Lohan was heading to an AA meeting this past weekend, but she wasn’t wearing her alcohol monitoring ankle bracelet. No one was checking the ankle bracelet anyway, so Lohan ditched the bracelet and decided to just face the cops before they came to her movie set and arrested her down the road.

Then again Lohan’s movie career may finally be over. Have any of the movies she done as an adult actually made any money at all? NO. What Lohan will be losing is her $4.5 million fee per movie.

Lohan was supposed to start filming "Poor Things" with Shirley MacLaine when she was out of rehab. But last week, product vendors including GE and Dell computers, who had been promised placement in the movie in exchange for cash, got a disturbing e-mail from set designer Fontaine Beauchamp Hebb.

Hebb’s e-mail, with the subject line: " ’Poor Things’ has been cancelled," said, "Sorry to be the harbinger of bad news, but I just received a call from Jacky Gilardi, the producer, pulling the plug on the ill-fated film.

"Apparently, Ms. Lohan’s antics in Las Vegas over the weekend have scared the bond companies and all of the funding has been pulled . . . I look forward to working together in the future and trust our next project will not be as fraught with difficulty."

The insurers were said to worry that Lohan, despite wearing an alcohol-monitoring device around her ankle and claiming to take daily drug tests, had gone out clubbing with pals, which included Las Vegas. (Ironically, the plot of "Poor Things" involves two women who befriend and then murder homeless men to collect their life insurance, which is based on a true story.)

If Hollywood is really interested in making good movies they will stop hiring bad actors like Lohan, who they only hire to give them more publicity for their film, which according to revenue per Lohan’s film has never caused her movies to turn a profit. A drawn out, and very dramatic, made for television Lohan DUI trial would make more money in advertising than any of her movies combined.

Lohan would be hell to work with on the set. Stumbling around bumping into people, puking between lines, curling up and going to sleep on other movie sets, then waking up and saying “What’s everyone looking at, I told you I am nod drunk okay,” and pointing at the alocohol monitoring bracelet on her ankle that no one checks.

Next stop in Lohan’s career, the Lifetime channel, or better yet commercials. I’d love to hear Lohan say, “do you suffer from vaginal dryness?” Will this DUI ordeal drive her to drink (more) and do (more) drugs which will send her into another downowrd spiral and lead to eventual death? She’s gonna take the Anna Nicole Smith route, and overdose in some hotel room.

Miss April 1989 was arrested over the weekend on an alleged DUI. Oberlin, Ohio police pulled over Jennifer Lyn Jackson and found beer bottles, marijuana, and rolling papers in her car. 

The former bunny managed to blow .077 on the breathalyzer, just sneaking under the state’s .08 limit. That’s like passing with a D minus grade. Not great, but passing nonetheless.

Jackson is pleading not guilty and will appear in court next week. You think Heff will still hire some good lawyers for her?

Al Gore III has been in trouble many times before. Is this a bad parenting issue?

- In 1996, he was suspended from his high school for smoking marijuana.
- In August 2000, he was ticketed for reckless driving by North Carolina police for driving 94 mph.
- In September 2002, military police arrested him on suspicion of drunk driving near a military base in Virginia.
- In 2003, he was charged with marijuana possession in Maryland after police stopped the car he was driving for not having its headlights on.
- In February 2004, he entered a substance abuse program as part of a plea agreement.

Here’s more:

Al Gore’s son was pulled over for speeding on a California freeway early Wednesday and arrested on suspicion of possessing marijuana and prescription drugs, authorities said.

Al Gore III, 24, was driving a blue Toyota Prius about 100 mph south on the San Diego Freeway when he was pulled over by sheriff’s deputies who said they smelled marijuana, said Sheriff’s Department spokesman Jim Amormino.

The deputies searched the car and found less than an ounce of marijuana along with Xanax, Valium, Vicodin, and Adderall, which is used for attention deficit disorder, Amormino said.

"He does not have a prescription for any of those drugs," Amormino said.

Gore was being held in the men’s central jail in Santa Ana on $20,000 bail.

Vivica Fox is the next Mel Gibson, only she’s a black drunk woman, who tries to use an accusation of racism to get out of a DUI. Here’s more:

Vivica A. Fox called a state patrol officer a "racist white cop" during her drunken driving arrest and repeatedly failed sobriety tests, according to an official report.

The 42-year-old actress, who is black, was pulled over in March after passing a California Highway Patrol officer who said her Cadillac was doing 80 mph and weaving in its lane on the Hollywood Freeway.

The officer noticed that Fox’s eyes were red and watery and that she had a "strong odor" of alcohol, according to the report. After she failed sobriety tests, he arrested Fox for investigation of driving under the influence.

"Fox began to walk away, yelling at my partner, ’Brother, help a sister, are you going to let this racist white cop do this. … Well, are you?’" according to the report.

Fox continued to speak in a "condescending manner" as she was placed in the patrol car, according to the report. She was taken to the Van Nuys jail, where a breath test was conducted but had to be stopped when she "burped quite loudly," the report said.

Breath tests indicated her blood-alcohol level was greater than .08 percent, California’s legal limit for a driver. She was charged in March with two misdemeanor counts of driving under the influence of alcohol and driving with a blood-alcohol level above the legal limit. Her arraignment was scheduled for July 19.

If convicted, Fox could face six months in jail and a $1,000 fine.

Fox said this month that she had made a "mistake" and would "hire a driver next time."

"It was an unfortunate judgment that I am taking full responsibility in," she said backstage at the Daytime Emmy Awards.

Fox obviously hates white people, and she’s the racist. Calling someone a racist, when they’re not, should be considered a hate crime against an innocent victim. The poor white cop should sue her for making false allegations that could have cost him his career. I’m hoping this "sister" gets that old white judge that did Paris, and she’s not only late to her court date, but she calls him a racist too. She might just spend the full six months in the Phoenix Sheriff’s tent city. The desert heat does not discriminate "sister," and neither did the breathalyzer.