Angelina Jolie has been fired by St. John according to OK! Magazine:

“Putting celebrities in campaigns is the biggest trend right now, everyone is doing it, but it didn’t work for St. John with Angelina," a fashion industry insider explains to OK!. "The people that wear St. John just didn’t relate to her.”

St. John’s collections are largely comprised of conservative suit outfits and are wardrobe staples of women such as Condoleeza Rice and Hillary Clinton.

Using Angelina probably wasn’t a good idea. Only 90 lb. anorexic girls could fit into the clothes modeled by her, so sales were slow. Angelina got the news she was fired, then attended a conference on global education at the Clinton Global Initiative Annual Meeting. Bill Clinton was as happy to see Angelina as a McDonald’s big mac. He kept inviting her back to his private suite, but she was a hard sell, even though he raised his white flag several times. Ever since his heart bypass surgery, Bill’s white flag only raises half mast, and Angelina never does anything halfway.

Jenna Jameson may have a fat wallet, but her claim that she’s not anorexic is wearing thin. Below are Jenna and Kim Kardashian whoring it, I mean, hamming it up. Kim has always been a ham, and Jenna looks like she could really use a thick slice of ham.

Apparently Keira Knightley’s stylist has been sacked because she showed up to the UK premiere of her film, "Atonement," wearing this Kleenex meets toga nightmare. Keira, you need to atone for this get-up! She’s played the love interest in various films, but with the chest of a seven year old anorexic boy, I’m guessing most guys would rather bone a block of swiss cheese. Many stars get caught with the occasional nip slip but, luckily for Keira, hers seem to have actually disappeared.

Renee Zellweger’s current weight can’t be healthy. The lollipop head and the protruding clavicle burs make us want to hold her down and shove Oreos in her mouth.

Heck, even the fat-free Oreos (retch) would provide some much-needed calories.

These side-by-side images of Zellweger, plumped up for the Bridget Jones role and today, are striking, though one would expect the difference to be dramatic.

Read more to see a picture of her next to Sarah Jessica Parker, also a distressing contrast. This is more than Renee just being "naturally thin." Renee makes Sarah look positively muscular.

Who’s the skinniest starlet is like an arms race. Hope this pic doesn’t cause SJP to up her treadmill time.

Nicole Richie had the coolest party ever. This is the same party Mischa Barton attended where she mixed her drugs and alcohol and, according to an insider, "was rolling around on the ground… and then suddenly she began screaming that she was dying." She then passed out and was taken to Sherman Oaks Hospital. Gees, I’m sorry I missed that one.

Nicole points out that none of the invitees know what Memorial Day really means. She makes it sound like it’s cool to bash and all around not appreciate U.S. troops dying so she can have her party. I liked the part where she said it’s the American dream to wear your sluttiest tops, tightest jeans, drink till you pass out, and wake up with your pants ripped open. Ah, the American dream.

We all know how sensitive Nicole is about being anorexic right? If you’re a fat chick you can’t get into this party. Fat to Nicole means you weigh more than 100 pounds. No fat chicks, just stick chicks are invited.