Anderson Cooper had a swim race with Michael Phelps on 60 Minutes on Sunday. Anderson just had his wet dream fulfilled, well, at least one of them.

Anderson Cooper passed Triumph the Insult Comic Dog a note at the Republican Convention that read:

Triumph -

I poop on

You

Anderson’s reaction when Triumph talked about two guys climaxing was priceless.

What do Anderson and Triumph have in common?

A much longer, and an extremely funny clip of Triumph at the Republican Convention is below.

Anderson Cooper called Living Lohan horrible, and said Ali Lohan, although 14 years-old, looks 60. Dina then issued a lame response, and Cooper responded back. Michael Lohan, never one to miss a media opportunity, also issued this response to Access Hollywood:

“I think Anderson Cooper is an opinionated, hypocritical idiot who should be an adult and keep his opinion to himself. He is the last person to judge anyone, when he and his own family have their own issues.”

We all know Michael is referring to the gay thing, which he should know a lot about since Lindsay Lohan is carrying on with Samantha Ronson. Michael should have just followed my advice, and called for an end to Living Lohan. The Lohans love a good down-and-dirty fight.

Cooper will no doubt be much more elegant if he responds to Michael.

Anderson Cooper hit a raw nerve with Dina Lohan when he spoke the truth about her horrible reality show. Typical of Dina, she went to OK! magazine, rather than CNN, to complain. Dina loves it. Anderson took the opportunity to hit back at Dina with a little more reality commenting. Dina is no match for Anderson.

Anderson Cooper filled in for Regis Philbin, and co-hosted alongside Kelly Ripa. Cooper said he hates Living Lohan, and called it a train wreck. He said:

"I can’t believe I’m wasting a minute of my life watching these horrific people. Living Lohan is just atrocious."

Cooper says Dina only got the show because of Lindsay Lohan, who is never on the show, and will never be on the show, but “we hope she is, and until then we’re stuck with these horrific people." Cooper then bashes Ali Lohan saying:

"Then there’s this seemingly nice 14 year-old girl, who looks to be about 60. She allegedly wants to be a singer, and/or actress slash performer of some sort, strip tease person, I don’t know. I say that with love and concern."

Cooper also says Dina is pushing Ali out there, telling her she’s a star. He’s got Dina pegged. Kelly tries to clean it up by saying:

"Their obviously a multi-talented family, the kids sing, and perform."

Coopers busts up laughing. Then says:

"Uh yeah sure, maybe that’s in the episode I didn’t see."

It’s hard not to be an Anderson Cooper fan after seeing this side of him.

Dina responded to OK! magazine saying:

"People are just cruel! This is bad karma for him."

Pushing your no-talent daughter out in front of the world seems a lot more cruel, than Cooper calling it for what it is.

When Michael Lohan issues his statement, coming any minute now, he would be smart to just agree with Cooper, and call for an end to Living Lohan.