Paris Hilton Claims That She’s ‘Not A Big Drinker”

Paris Hilton’s Larry King Interview was chock full of nuggets, but perhaps none better than this little gem:

"I’m just not a big drinker. I’m not really into it."

Really, folks. She said it. In Paris’ defense, she may honestly not remember that she has ever had a drink. She probably doesn’t even remember why she was in prison. It’s a miracle that she didn’t forget where she was halfway through the interview and panic.

Paris also claimed in the interview that she has never used drugs. Another likely story. It’s clear that Paris has no interest in developing any kind of honest relationship with either the media or the public. I’ll go out on a limb here and guess that she has learned absolutely nothing for her little stay behind bars.

The good news here is that she will no doubt provide us with years of boneheaded behavior to make us all feel like bona fide geniuses.