Jessica Simpson Wants to Lose the Fat

Jessica Simpson is one of a large list of stars that has to attend a lot of events to keep everyone from forgetting she still exists. She said at 2007 Cannes Film Festival where she is promoting a movie that hasn’t even started production yet:

“It’s basically this girl who’s a major movie star, who wants to be more respected because she always gets the blonde bimbo parts. She doesn’t get the roles she wants and ends up walking in on her costar, who is her boyfriend, and her hairdresser! And she figures she doesn’t want this life anymore. So she joins the Marines.”

“I’m back on an extreme diet and workout,” she said. “I have to be able to do take after take of push-ups and climbing walls and going through trenches and what-not! In honor of Moore, Simpson adds, “I’m working on my one armed push-up-in my high heels!”

Um, good luck with that. Might I suggest a body double.

…and then there’s that fake relationship with John Mayer. In Touch Weekly reports:

John – who split with Jessica last Monday, insiders say, because he needed more space – was seen exiting Jessica’s hotel, the Soho Grand in New York, at 12 p.m. today. “He was looking really happy,” an eyewitness tells In Touch. “He couldn’t stop smiling.”

A pal of Jessica’s confirms, “They definitely went on a date last night,” but cautions that the once-divorced star isn’t ready to get back together with John immediately. “She still loves him, but he’s not stable,” the friend explains. “He’s scared of commitment. He breaks up with her and then regrets it and then begs her to get back together.”

Does Jessica know what a booty call is? Probably not. It’s better that she doesn’t know for John’s sake.