Jessica Simpson Looks Good, But Is Too Dumb to Remember Lyrics

Jessica Simpson has done it again.

The New York Daily News reports that she has botched another attempt to warble her hero’s big Eighties hit.

Jessica Simpson thought she’d try channeling Dolly Parton another time at the Stride gum party in L.A. at Teddy’s on Thursday night, but again messed up the words to "Nine to Five." Little sis Ashlee, who hosted, thankfully did not try to lip-sync.

You would think that Simpson, who is a singer (!!) and claims to idolize Parton, would either stop singing the song in public or make a real effort to learn the words.

It’s not even as if it’s the only Parton hit worth singing; she’s written almost 600 songs.

Jolene, I Will Always Love You, Islands In The [Effing] Stream for crying out loud!

Simpson could drag a drunken, non-English-speaking stranger from the audience to sing the Kenny Rogers parts and it would still be a better tribute to Dolly than this insistence on mangling 9 to 5.

Face it, Jess. They’re never going to remake the movie and cast you as Doralee.

Never.