Even $1 Million Won’t Thaw the Ice Between Paris Hilton and Today’s Matt Lauer

Today will pay Paris Hilton $1 million for the privilege of being the first TV outlet to broadcast her post-jail whining.

Not a surprising development, but still disheartening.

Paris Hilton will likely trot out of jail Monday, attend a big fat party thrown by her daddy in Vegas, and then hop on a private jet to get paid a fortune for talking to Meredith Vieira about how jail is so hard.

It’s a place where you get locked up in a cell smaller than Hilton’s walk-in closet and it’s COLD in there. So not "hot."

According to the New York Post, Hilton refused to be interviewed by Matt Lauer because he’s said "disparaging" things about her in the past.

Maybe she’s just still miffed about him dressing up like her for Halloween a couple years ago. It was great!