Always the Bridesmaid Never the Bride

Up next on the main stage Destiny!!!! fresh off her weekend as a bridesmaid, Destiny likes guys who can make her laugh, and remember to put the toilet seat down. DESTINY gentleman!!!!

I see 5 std’s, 2 abortions, 3 restraining orders, 4 arrests, 1 baby daddy, 4 b*stard kids, 3 alcoholics, and 1 future Oxy contin head in that line-up. The Asian chick with tattoos might be worth it all.

Real whores wear flip flops to weddings. Best wedding ever!

You can’t make whore a housewife, but it would be worth trying … all her friends.

A Male Fairy Tale

Once upon a time, a Prince asked a beautiful Princess, Will you marry me? The Princess said, No!!! And the Prince lived happily ever after and rode motorcycles and b*nged skinny long-legged big-t!tted broads and hunted and fished and raced cars and went to n*ked bars and dated women half his age and drank whiskey, beer and Captain Morgan and never heard b!tching and never paid child support or alimony and b*nged cheerleaders and kept his house and guns and ate spam and potato chips and beans and blew enormous farts and never got cheated on while he was at work and all his friends and family thought he was frikin cool as hell and he had tons of money in the bank and left the toilet seat up.

The end.